wooooot... i'm back! i'm belong to the lucky batch who enlist and get to book out 5 days after the enlistment date.. usually it's 2 weeks of confinement for ptp and 3 weeks for normal bmt.. but for us we have bmtc celebration today and new years tmr.. so yea. could use a little break now. fuck! the thought of going back on thursday... argh. i really lost my mood already. it's not that the training is physically challenged. to my surprise (or maybe it's because it's just the first few days) the training is very very manageable. the endurance training is a walk in the park. (literally! and the park isn't very big) probably it's also due to the fact that i belong to PES C9, the worst of the PES C categories and just a notch higher than PES E. we do not have to do IPPT (that's the army version of napfa) and SOC (standard obstacle course) cuz there's something wrong with everyone. my whole platoon is made up of C9 dudes, and i think we are the most despised platoon cuz we're suposed to have the slackest training programmes.. hence the physical training programme is not tough (at least so far) but the people are really really damn fierce and demanding. sheesh. that's what makes life there difficult. anyway... there are many many familiar faces in my company, zhipeng edward junquan phillip to name a few. in fact my section consists of 3 rj fencers and 4 rafflesians in total.. not bad sia. hopefully can make more friends. hmm i wrote a damn long post about army life but luckily zy reminded me something.. had to delete them all heh. the next time i'm going back in.. which is in two days time, i'll be confined for 10 days (or more if i make any stupid mistake) before i can come out again. again i pray that i dun screw up too much and get everyone into trouble heh.

hmm.. enlistment in 2 days time. it's a bit too abrupt for me because i only knew about it a few days back. not really prepared for it.. was just looking at the list of stuff to bring. what the heck is a gutter and a dog tag? bah... don't have time to buy any of these shit... may just kope from people i know.. (hope that i'm with people i know) i hope i don't die in the bmt. been telling myself to go run after As.. and i've not done so. and now there's only two days left, can't do much. oh man i dunno if there's anyone who is more unprepared than me! i'm really courting death. for the next two or three weeks.. wun be in mainland, will be busy training in tekong. will miss a lot of stuff.. i think apart from friends and family, i will miss my bed a lot. but heard the bed there is branded .. so hopefully it isn't so bad heh. anyway, merry christmas

just received a call.. going to be enlisted on the 26th december. woot.. that's same as zp and a few others i know. sheesh it all comes so fast i realised i have only one week of freedom left. can't waste it! hmmm...

bad day today. all started off with a bunch of motherfuckers who made fun of my name in the bus. (you see, i was wearing my ex-class jersey with my name printed boldly at the back) i sort of fought with them and gave them the finger. and was pissed throughout.. and when i'm pissed i can't think behave properly... so i sort of made everyone arnd me pissed too. bleah. pool was terrible... can't hit anything. everything's gone wrong. damn embarrassing too.. couldnt tolerate 1/3 of a bottle of nama sake. no one turned red except me. wasted my goddamned money. it tasted just like beer.. not nice. the vodka chocolate milk i had yesterday at heather's house was nice though. now i have a new resolution.. never lose my temper at strangers. the most i can do is give the finger (which i still think is reasonable enough) never push strangers to the floor, never tell them to fuck off. i'll be a happier man. argh... today is a bad day. =(

always look on the bright side of life... now i have time to do the things i want. i have time to train myself. i have opportunities to work and earn money. what's so bad about that?

whoa man.. at this rate i'm gonna die of fatigue soon. slept at 4 two days back, and slept 2 hr yesterday. slept another hour on the bus. now i'm feeling high lol. as shi qing has said i always ended up doing stupid things when i'm with him. after visiting yizhuan's mom at her house we decided to go cycling but we were stuck in an underpass for a fucking hour because of a heavy downpour. ended up catching frogs and playing with spiders. and just when we thought the rain was over and ran out of the underpass the rain resumed, making both of us severely drenched. had dinner with yizhuan at pastamania.. not bad at all. then played one hour of pool.. but could barely finish a game in one hour cuz all of us were so lousy! LOL! then watched infernal affairs over at shiqing's house. and then watched ong bak (without the english subtitles.. but then again there is no plot) and played a bit of gunbound until 4. then i went to sleep. couldnt sleep until 5 and the alarm woke me up at seven. zzz. really need to save money. the money spent the past two weeks on various stuff is more than what i spent during the whole exam season. i think.. average of 15 bucks a day. been going rika's house to play a few times and taking cab home everytime cuz the last bus is gone. (lucky i shared cab with isaac.. so it's umm cheaper) hope today is the last day i'm gonna spend. later gonna go watch infernal affairs 3 with kheng seng. but it's a great show so it's worth spending. zhongyang's enlisted already... heard he's in same company as a lot of guys. though not all are particularly likable, at least he has company in his company.. heard the sleeping hours are 10 to 5.30! that's madness... i'm going to die when i go army. but i think qingxiang's gonna die even more haha. anyway.. hope he's doing fine. i miss him already. leo's still away in langkawi. damn i miss him too. hope he has a good time suntanning and has a great first clubbing experience heh. hmm. realised i missed zhipeng and edison too. havent seen them for awhile cuz they din go for prom. bet zhipeng's having a good time playing his new comp. he is another leo.. completed call of duty in one day?! madness..fuck. what is wrong with me LOL! been having a weird feeling these days. the lonely feeling you have after a stayover (e.g. camp or trip) i know yau hong and heather share my sentiments. i think what i need now is a real good sleep.

funny.. haven't slept the whole of last night but i'm still wide awake now. only slept one hour frm 10 to 11. feeling tired but not sleepy.. thats very weird. hmm.. prom was yesterday. wasn't as great as i expected, and it's partially my fault. i forgot to bring a bloody camera. initially was allocated to sit with 9 other girls, but after that i switched seats as i was feeling a little uncomfortable being the only guy there.. and realised that i was on a table where 3/4 of the guys there aren't from my class. the few that are like lincoln.. was always away taking photos. hence i ate a lot cuz that's the only thing i could do. occasionally standing up taking pics with ppl who approached me. but mostly taking pics for ppl. cuz i dun have a camera. maybe i shouldve stayed in my original seating plan. remembered sec 4 grad dinner was more fun.. hmm. and the dishes served were not fantastic.. maybe because i've tried it a few times before (had meals at shangrila the past two christmas.. the dishes were exactly the same.) after that things got better. went partying at industry... haven't been clubbing since june but i think this will be the final time i'm going before i enlist. lost a bit of interest there.. and.. can't find the right clubbers to go with =(. (anyway.. the dj at club industry is really the worst dj i've ever encountered. totaly awful. )was intending to take a cab home after the party ended but luckily qx's class agreed to take me in. zy yh and heather joined us so i wasn't so extra after all. chilled until morning. reached home.. slept and woke up. sigh.. i admit the chilling part was the most enjoyable. everyone's having their own programs and life now.. on the other hand, i have a feeling my life ends officially today. can't think of anything to do for the rest of the hols. if no one asks me out, i'll probably rot at home while struggling to reach a metal axe ranking in gunbound. this week is gonna be loooooooooooong... leo's having fun in langkawi, zy's having fun in tekong.. so that means that two of my frens whom i talk the most rubbish to are away. no one to whine to while playing gunbound; no one to turn to for spontaneous outings. that sounds really sad, (and gay), but fuck, it's true. i'm gonna be bored out of my mind. tmr going to cmpb for the final review. i sincerely hope they don't postpone it because if they do, it's gonna be the... sixth time?

at times i really wish there's no competition in this world. cuz in every competition, i end up losing. rankings suck as well, knowing that i'm at the bottom of like everything. games are only fun to people who are good at them. for the rest, it's a vicious activity that attacks your morale and self-esteem so much that you just feel like giving up on everything. hmm... fuck competition fuck rankings! if only everyone is the same. or seems to be the same. no one knows you're lousy and no one gives a damn if you're good. wouldnt life be more beautiful this way no?

that fucking bitch just doesn't know what she's doing. if she's born on this world to make my life miserable i swear to fucking god i'll make her die in hell. mother fucking cunt sucking whore. i feel so much better.

woot.. exam is finally over... haha it's abit late to say now but the atmosphere is still here. no more studying for three years... woot. must learn to spend less money.. spent like a hundred and fifty bucks.. and still counting. tmr gonna go and buy prom stuff... but my uncle's treating i think. damn nice guy.. help me save some money heh. btw... go and watch love actually... it's a fantastic show although i think they snipped off a whole two characters off the show. -_- lots of things to do now.. on the comp at least. can't wait =D